08122020Headline:
Melania

Melania Trump To Promote Healthy School Lunches, More Exercise As First Lady

THE WHITE HOUSE — Melania Trump wasted no time in announcing her pet project as the nation’s 45th first lady. During a luncheon hosted by outgoing first lady Michelle Obama, Mrs. Trump said she wanted American children to adopt healthier [...]

Flint Tap Water Rated More Trustworthy than Hillary Clinton

A new survey released today from the Make Michigan Great Again PAC shows that residents across the state rated Flint tap water higher on the ‘Trustworthiness’ scale than democratic nominee for President, Hillary Rodham Clinton. In the [...]

Donald Trump Hires ‘Clueless’ Stacey Dash for ‘Negro Outreach Program’

TRUMP TOWER — With his poll numbers among black voters hovering around 1%, presumptive GOP nominee Donald Trump reportedly tapped actress and FOX News contributor Stacey Dash as his “Negro Outreach Program” Ambassador. “She connects [...]

Sarah Palin Wants Arabic Numerals Banned From America’s Schools

WASILLA, Alaska — Former Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin, who recently curbed her demanding speaking schedule in order to care for her injured husband Todd, found time to support Ted Cruz’s call for stricter monitoring of Muslim neighborhoods [...]

Trojan Name New Ultra-Thin Skin Condom after Donald Trump

Trojan, the world leader in modern condom technology, announced today the company has developed the world’s thinnest-skin condom to date, and will market the new condom after the thinnest-skinned man to ever run for President of the United [...]

Canada Offers to Build Wall Around Bristol Palin’s Vaginal Cavity

TORONTO – A northern firestorm erupted earlier today when an off-the-record comment made by Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau was leaked to the outside press. During an interview with the CBC Thursday morning, Trudeau made what some [...]


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