‘Wounded Social Justice Warrior Project’ Rebuilds Hope; Sense of Purpose
Prudence Bradley, 19, found it difficult to put into words what she experienced during her days as a social justice warrior. She didn’t have to. The way the slightly overweight feminist apologetically paused, fought back tears, and forced [...]
Trump University Study Finds Correlation Between Menthol Cigarettes and Voter Fraud
New York City, NY – As Donald Trump takes on the Republican establishment, Democrats and the mainstream media, he’s telling supporters they’re fighting against a “rigged” system, rife with voter fraud. The left, predictably, say talk [...]
Jared Kushner’s Dick Sued by Pencil Company Over Brand Confusion
WASHINGTON, DC— Jared C. Kushner, husband of first daughter and East Asian entrepreneuse Ivanka Trump, was named as Defendant in a lawsuit brought by Gotwood Pencil Company, alleging brand confusion between Defendant’s dick and Plaintiff’s [...]
Trump Reports World Record 39 Under Par, 12 Holes-in-One, During Golf Outing
President Donald Trump hit the links over the weekend and reportedly broke two long standing world records and accomplished golf’s greatest feat. Trump reportedly finished the round of 18 with a whopping 39 under par breaking the previous [...]
Atlanta Falcons Win Popular Vote, Still Lose Super Bowl LI
<Houston, TX> The results of Super Bowl LI are in, and the winner is the New England Patriots.
After pulling out to an early 28-3 lead, Atlanta allowed the Patriots to reel off 25 consecutive points to tie the game and secure an overtime [...]
Punxsutawney Phil Predicts Four More Years of Snowflakes
Punxsutawney, PA – The handlers of Pennsylvania’s most famous groundhog, Punxsutawney Phil, said the furry whiskered rodent saw his shadow early Thursday morning, predicting four more years of insufferable snowflakes.
The top hat-wearing [...]
