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Trump Reports World Record 39 Under Par, 12 Holes-in-One, During Golf Outing

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President Donald Trump hit the links over the weekend and reportedly broke two long standing world records and accomplished golf’s greatest feat.  Trump reportedly finished the round of 18 with a whopping 39 under par breaking the previous record set by former North Korean dictator Kim Jong-Il in 1994.  The record breaking round included no less than 12 holes-in-one also besting the previous record set by Jong-Il making Trump the greatest golfer in recorded history.

In what is being dubbed the “greatest golf match in history”, Trump came out swinging with holes-in-one on the first three holes (410 yard par 4, 387 yard par 4 and 464 yard par 4) followed by a double-eagle on the difficult 570 yard par 5  hole 4.  After a strong 450 yard drive into the wind, Trump reportedly sunk the 120 yard approach shot with ease.  He followed that up with holes-in-one on the next two holes (a challenging 135 yard par 3 and a long 363 yard par 4) before recording a birdie on the 560 yard par 5 seventh hole.  Trump wrapped up the front 9 with two more holes-in-one for a total of 7 aces going into the second round with an amazing score of just 12.

The back nine proved to be more of a challenge for Trump who rimmed out a putt on the 547 yard par 5 tenth hole for a birdie.  Hole 11, a 434 yard dog leg left par 4 proved to be no challenge for Trump as he drained his tea shot for what would be his 8th ace of the day.  Hole 12, a long and challenging dog leg right par 4 at faced a similar fate as Trump rolled one in from 454 yards out.  Hole 13, a straight away par 5 at 529 yards proved to be Trump’s worst hole of the day on the scorecard.  Although reaching the green in just one massive drive, Trump reportedly three-putted for a birdie.  The visibly distressed Trump held his composure to go on to drain the next three tea shots on hole 14 (209 yard par 3), hole 15 (a short yet challenging 379 yard par 4), and hole 16 (a slight dog leg left par 4 at 403 yards) for a world record 12 holes-in-one and an astounding 39 under par round of 55.  From all accounts it was a round of the ages.

Trump reportedly wrapped up his evening with dinner for members of club.  No word yet as to how incredible the dinner was, but all assumptions point to it being incredible, fantastic, and the best.



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8 Responses to "Trump Reports World Record 39 Under Par, 12 Holes-in-One, During Golf Outing"

  1. Mikebike says:

    He s got a long way to go to beat Obama record times wasted on the golf course

    • Jim_In_Mukilteo says:

      Mikebike, obviously you are uninformed. Kim Jong Il is reported not to ever have to defecate. Donald Trump claims he is a great golfer. Both are full of shit. Donald Trump is a psychopath. If his lips are moving, he’s lying. Don’t believe me? Google “20 traits of a psychopath.” It’s Trump to a “T.”

  2. thomasammy81 says:


  3. David says:

    Amazing how these golf records by Trump and Kim Jong Il could only be made when cameras weren’t visible. Clearly, we need to find a way to make cameras invisible, or perhaps to hide them inside of microwave ovens.

  4. John says:

    This is absolutely insane. I AM SHOOK

  5. Francis E Force says:

    I was right there with you until the next to the last paragraph where you say “the Trump administration who in just three weeks has managed to alienate much of his base”. Trumpers don’t care about any of this stuff. They have their own facts that they get from their own sources that they think are more valid than the vetted news media. Like Trump said “I could shoot somebody on Fifth Avenue and I wouldn’t lose a vote.”

  6. LOL says:

    This is such an obvious lie. No cameras… huh… he get 12 holes-in-one… 39 under par… Just no. If he were that good, he would be a professional golfer.

  7. Phil Williams says:

    12 holes-in-one would be unbelievable even at a miniature golf course. Just more narcissism.

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