10192017Headline:

US Soccer Team Announces Boycott of 2018 World Cup Held in Russia

<National Report>While Donald Trump has spent the last few weeks picking fights with the dark skinned players in the NFL, the US Men’s Soccer team has made the strongest statement yet in professional sports against the President’s [...]

Trump Reports World Record 39 Under Par, 12 Holes-in-One, During Golf Outing with Japanese Prime Minister

President Donald Trump and Japanese Prime Minister Shinzo Abe hit the links at the world famous Trump National Jupiter Golf Club & Spa on Saturday with hopes of forging a diplomatic bond but ended up with much more. While no press was [...]

Atlanta Falcons Win Popular Vote, Still Lose Super Bowl LI

<Houston, TX> The results of Super Bowl LI are in, and the winner is the New England Patriots. After pulling out to an early 28-3 lead, Atlanta allowed the Patriots to reel off 25 consecutive points to tie the game and secure an overtime [...]

North Korea Announces Kim Jong-un Takes Gold In Pairs Figure Skating and Two Man Bobsled!

<National Report>The Democratic People’s Republic of Korea’s (North Korea) Ministry of Information announced today that although the country had sent an Olympic delegation to the Sochi games, and did not send a team, its people [...]