Sarah Palin Wants Afghans Banned From America’s Armchairs, Sofas, Beds & Attics
WASILLA, Alaska — In a strongly worded Facebook post, former Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin urged all Americans to ban knitted and crocheted afghans from their sofas, armchairs, beds, attics, and homes, to “remove the dangerous and radical forces [...]
BREAKING: Bristol Palin Struck by Semi
Wasilla, AK – Bristol Palin is home resting comfortably after being struck by a semi late Friday night. The 25-year-old unwed mother of two was reportedly broadsided outside Krazy Moose Subs near the intersection of E Herning Ave and [...]
Canada Offers to Build Wall Around Bristol Palin’s Vaginal Cavity
TORONTO – A northern firestorm erupted earlier today when an off-the-record comment made by Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau was leaked to the outside press. During an interview with the CBC Thursday morning, Trudeau made what some [...]
Bristol Palin Diagnosed with Chronic DTF
Wasilla, AK – According to several independent Alaskan media outlets, Bristol Palin has allegedly been diagnosed with chronic DTF. This crushing news comes just one month after giving birth to her second out-of-wedlock child, the beautiful [...]
Sarah Palin Diagnosed With STFU
WASILLA, Alaska – Former Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin has been diagnosed with STFU, according to multiple media outlets. The diagnosis became public shortly after Palin blamed both President Barack Obama and the condition known as Post Traumatic [...]
Sarah Palin Bans Muslims from Entering Bristol Palin
Wasilla, AK – Conservative superstar Sarah Palin says she supports Republican presidential frontrunner Donald Trump’s call for a ban on admitting Muslims into the United States, stating she once put a similar ban in place while she [...]
