06242017Headline:

Flint Tap Water Rated More Trustworthy than Hillary Clinton

Photo by Medill DC via Flickr (CC BY 2.0)

Photo by Medill DC via Flickr (CC BY 2.0)

A new survey released today from the Make Michigan Great Again PAC shows that residents across the state rated Flint tap water higher on the ‘Trustworthiness’ scale than democratic nominee for President, Hillary Rodham Clinton.

In the ‘Most Trustworthy’ category, Hillary scored a dismal 14% among active registered voters while Flint tap water scored a surprising 49%.


While the final tallies were a shock to many residents, MI Governor Rick Snyder isn’t surprised at all. “Well, what do you expect?” laughed Synder, “unlike the tap water in Flint, the folks here in Michigan can see right through that woman.”

Governor Snyder isn’t buying in to all the what he called “Hysterical hoopla” surrounding Flint’s water crisis, adding, “A lot of folks in Flint like to blame all of their problems on the water. We have a name for those types of people,” Snyder takes a pause for dramatic effect, “democrats.”

Photo by timquijano (CC BY 2.0)

Photo by timquijano (CC BY 2.0)

Oakland County resident Stanley Taylor agrees with the governor. “At some point you have to stop blaming the water for the fact your kids are dumb and lazy.” Asked if he was surprised by the survey results, Stan replied, “I would trust a fart after a Taco Bell run more than I’d ever trust Crooked Hillary.”

Past findings from the Make Michigan Great Again PAC were also critical of Mrs. Clinton’s trustworthiness. “Hillary’s lies affects children’s brain development resulting in reduced intelligence quotient (IQ), behavioral changes such as shortening of attention span, increased antisocial behavior, and reduced educational attainment. Exposure to Hillary’s falsehoods can also cause anemia, hypertension, renal impairment, immunotoxicity and toxicity to reproductive organs. The neurological and behavioral effects of Clinton’s lies are believed to be irreversible.”

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