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(AP Photo/Gero Breloer)

Airline Announces Closed Circuit Porn Available on Domestic Flights

<DALLAS, TX> Aviophobia (fear of flying) sufferers will soon have an airline to help them relax. Southwestern Airlines has announced that closed circuit pornography will be made available to those passengers that wish to view such premium [...]
(AP Photo/Gene J. Puskar)

Starbucks Halts ‘Race Together’ Initiative After Burn Unit Overcrowdings

SEATTLE – With race-related incidents dominating headlines, Starbucks CEO Howard Schulz decided to launch an initiative called “Race Together“, in a attempt to stimulate dialogue and debate about race relations in America. Although [...]
(AP Photo/Gene J. Puskar)

Car Owners Baffled As More Tampons Are Found In Mazda 6 Engines

Julia Meyers of Fort Worth, Texas bought her brand new 2015 Mazda 6 Grand Touring last month, and thought she’d “fallen in love with driving all over again.” That is, until her engine randomly started smoking on Monday. After [...]
(AP Photo/Jim Cole)

NYC Bum Makes 10k A Week Begging Quarters

A dirty, bedraggled, sad and broken looking man wanders the streets and subways of New York City. His name is Jim Tooney, not that you’d ever think to ask. He looks like the kind of man deserving of mercy to some, and the kind that others [...]
(AP Photo/Matt Rourke)

Crayola Named Fifty Shades of Grey Official Sponsor

Crayola®, best known for its world-famous line of children’s crayons, has entered into a sponsorship agreement with producers of the Fifty Shades of Grey movie, based on the 2011 erotic novel by British author E. L. James, according to [...]
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Plans for American Sniper Theme Park / Shooting Range Announced

By: Cornelius Bartholomew “Cassidy” Pen-TNReport Investigative Reporter/Journalist DOUGLASWOOD, GA -Americans can look forward to a new family fun center in 2016. The Kyle Estate, in association with Fox News Corp, has announced [...]
(AP Photo/J. David Ake)

IRS Will Automatically Deduct Student Loan Payments Starting September 2015

<National Report>If you received a student loan to help finance your college education, make sure your repayment status is in good standing. The IRS has been granted the authority to automatically deduct late or defaulted payments from [...]
(AP Photo/Jon Elswick, File)

Obamacare Website Tracks Your File Sharing & Downloads, Says Whistleblower

<National Report>According to a government whistleblower, President Obama and the US Justice Department agreed to share user information and computer IP addresses with record industry executives in an effort to stop online piracy. [...]
(AP Photo/Manuel Balce Ceneta)

Sarah Palin’s Search For Elon Musk Cologne Adds To Lamestream Media Dogpile

<National Report>Last month, former Alaska Governor Sarah Palin spent hours searching for the perfect Christmas present for husband Todd – a bottle of Elon Musk cologne. It was only after the former Veep nominee encountered a quick-witted [...]
(AP Photo/Stuart Ramson)

Sopranos Remake Green Lit For Fall 2015

HOLLYWOOD, CA – A remake of the HBO series The Sopranos has begun production, set for a fall 2015 debut. Actor Val Kilmer will produce, direct and star as mob boss Tony Soprano, according to television industry insiders. Kilmer, best known [...]
Markus "Notch" Persson (Image Courtesy of Flickr/ Wikimedia Commons)

Minecraft Creator “Notch” Building Theme Park In New York State

Minecraft creator Markus “Notch” Persson made headlines recently for his purchase of an outlandish $70 million palatial mansion in Beverly Hills, but it turns out the most expensive residential property sale in Los Angeles history [...]
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New Texas Restaurant REQUIRES Patrons to Open Carry

AUSTIN, Texas – A new restaurant called Cash ‘N’ Carry is quickly becoming the Lone Star state’s most popular eating place. A sign at the door says, “No Shirt, No Gun, No Service.” You must be armed – with cash and a firearm – [...]
(AP Photo/J. Scott Applewhite)

Obama’s Comments Send SONY Stock Into Freefall

THE WHITE HOUSE – SONY’s stock price plunged to an all-time low after President Obama’s critical remarks on Friday about the corporation’s decision to cancel the premiere of the Seth Rogen-James Franco comedy The Interview. [...]
(AP Photo/Jason Reed, Pool, File)

Rumors Circulate Of $300 Million Fox News Buyout of The Onion

Is cable news giant Fox News on the cusp of signing a $300 million deal to buyout satire giant The Onion? Rumors have been circulating for the past 24 hours that indicate that News Corp and Onion Inc. might be on the verge of striking the lofty [...]
(AP Photo/Rob Griffith)

Sydney’s Lindt Cafe Receives Multiple Negative Yelp Reviews Following Hostage Crisis

While the investigation into the deadly hostage siege at Sydney’s Lindt Chocolat Cafe begins, it’s business as usual for crowd-sourced review sites, especially Yelp. Several customers – some of them who survived the 16-hour [...]
Photo by Chuck Kennedy / PD

President Obama… “White Privilege & Christianity Slowed American Progress”

By Nigel J. Covington III Editor-in-Chief Earlier today, President Obama, delivered his report on America’s trade performance and the economy before a crowd of entrepreneurs, businessmen and small business owners at a conference in Dallas, [...]