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Clinton Cannabis Culprits Caught Early Voting

KENOSHA WI, One person was hospitalized today when police and swat officers in riot gear apprehended a 1982 VW Vanload of crazed hipsters who attempted to early vote for Democratic Presidential Candidate Hillary Clinton while baked out of their [...]

Trump Vows to Be Tough on Clown Crime

Sources close to the Donald Trump campaign report that the Republican candidate “plans to speak out on the spike in ‘clown incidents’ across the United States” over recent weeks. At National Report, I’ve previously [...]
Photo by Yannick Croissant via Flickr (CC BY 4.0)

Man Shouts ‘Allahu Akbar!’ Before Photobomb

Amsterdam, Netherlands – According to Dutch police, a crazed man detonated a devastating photobomb on an unsuspecting newlywed couple visiting Amsterdam on their honeymoon. (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({});The couple, John [...]
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U.S. Considers Raising National Alert Level over Clown Threat

Due to the increase of ‘creepy clown threats’ across the United States over the past few weeks, the United States Government has allegedly begun meetings regarding dealing with this threat on a national level. While local authorities [...]
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Killing of Minority Male Leads to Increased Police Scrutiny

Demonstrations Against Recent Police Shooting Erupt in Inner City The recent police shooting of an unarmed minority male has caused uproar in the inner city and has prompted civil rights groups to demonstrate in front of the police station. [...]
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ISIS Claims Responsibility for Sinking Titanic

SINONE, Iraq – The Islamic State (IS, formerly ISIS/ISIL) has claimed responsibility for the catastrophic 1912 sinking of the RMS Titanic. Long believed to be a tragic accident, today’s announcement raises new questions about a possible [...]
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Deleted Clinton Emails Found on Hacked Leslie Jones Site

The world has “reacted in horror” to comedian and actress, Leslie Jones’ personal website and cloud accounts being hacked. The hacker or hackers allegedly compromised Jones’ cloud account and obtained personal information [...]
(Image:  YouTube)

Simone Biles’ Gold Medals STOLEN From Olympic Village; Lochte Questioned

RIO DE JANEIRO, Brazil — In another crime-related Rio Olympics story, sources say four gold medals awarded to American gymnast Simone Biles turned up missing from the hotel room the 19-year-old phenom shares with teammate Laurie Hernandez. The [...]
Photo by Matthew G via Flickr (CC BY 2.0)

Man Shouts ‘Allahu Akbar’ Before Blowing Up Friend’s Inbox

De Pere, WI – A Wisconsin man is resting comfortably after an explosion rocked his inbox late Saturday afternoon. The blast occurred at approximately 4:45 pm leaving the victim, Anthony Stewart, 41, physically fine but emotionally drained. [...]
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You Will Not Believe What One Homeless Man Found In A Dumpster

A local homeless man made a horrific discovery last night when he found a discarded photo of a newborn infant in a Springfield, Illinois dumpster. Police are now looking for the person who callously left the photo of the newborn in the dumpster [...]
Photo by Alberto Cabello Creative Commons Attribution 2.0 Generic (CC BY 2.0)

KISS Army Veteran Tommy Thayer Accused of Stolen Valor

Terre Haute, IN – KISS Army veteran Tommy Thayer may finally face stolen valor charges after a KISS Army soldier in Terra Haute, IN, discovered an official KISS t-shirt featuring the scab guitarist’s likeness in place of original six-stringer [...]
Photo by Martin Fisch Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 2.0 Generic (CC BY-SA 2.0)

Cincinnati to Create “Leash Law” for Children under 12

After the unfortunate shooting death of Harambe the gorilla at the Cincinnati Zoo, the internet and others with the actual ability to enact policy have begun thinking of how future crises involving children could be averted. Many Monday morning [...]
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NRA Member Praises “Good Guy With A Gun” In Cincinnati

“We really dodged a bullet on Saturday, pun not intended of course,” said proud NRA member Thomas Ripley of La Grange, OH on a now deleted Facebook post. “If it wasn’t for that ‘good guy with a gun’, not [...]
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Harriet Tubman Descendant Arrested in $20 Counterfeiting Ring, Report Says

NEW YORK, N.Y. — Gertie Tubman, 54, who has long claimed to be the great-great granddaughter of former slave and abolitionist Harriet Tubman, was arrested along with several others in connection with an alleged counterfeiting ring, where [...]
source: Yahoo Free Images (http://nbjenglish.wikispaces.com/)

Police Bust Wisconsin Sodomy and Drug Manufacturing Farm

By: Cornelius Bartholomew “Cassidy” Pen – TNReport Investigative Journalist Ridgeway, WI – A police raid of a suspected sodomy farm led to a startling discovery in Ridgeway, a small Wisconsin town in Iowa county, about [...]
Hillary Blimp

Bad News for D.C. Scandal Queen, ‘Dirty Hillary’ as Top Aide Granted Immunity

By Nigel J. Covington III Editor-in-Chief Facing the biggest political showdown of her life in what promises to be one of the most brutal and punishing political campaigns in history, Hillary Clinton, must now square off with the ever popular, [...]