10302014Headline:
Ted_Cruz_by_Gage_Skidmore_2

Ted Cruz Rejects 2nd Grader’s Invitation To Halloween Party While Insulting Obama

Senator Ted Cruz apparently doesn’t want anything to do with President Barack Obama… and he isn’t afraid to tell literally anyone how he really feels about him. On Tuesday, the potential 2016 presidential contender emailed [...]
Pageant Crown3

Miss US Constitution Beauty Pageant Stirs Controversy

<LAGUNA NIGUEL, California> The upcoming Miss United States Constitution Beauty Pageant has once again come under fire from women’s rights groups and civil rights organizations. “Womyn are not display objects for society’s approval, [...]
amaryllis-spy-plantRes

NSA Greenhouses Growing “Spy” Houseplants

WASHINGTON DC – A Former National Security Agency data analyst, referred to here as ‘Alan X’ per his request, has spilled the beans on “Operation Greenglass,” a domestic surveillance project developed in conjunction [...]
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Obama Administration Looking Into Strict New Sugar Regulations

Halloween has long been a favorite holiday for many a youngster in the United States. But if President Barack Obama has it his way, a key factor into the popularity of the spooky tradition may be lost in 2015… and several other holidays, [...]
VP Biden

Biden Calls Obama ‘Barack Ebola’ During Speech to Rocket Scientists

<National Report> An early Christmas gift was given to Republicans yesterday, when Joe Biden inadvertently referred to the President as ‘Barack Ebola’ during a speech before a group of aerospace engineers at NASA’s Washington headquarters. Biden, [...]
Bush Obama

Barbara Bush Criticized for Michelle Obama “Slam”

The left-wing media is all atwitter over a comment made by former first lady Barbara Bush in an upcoming Parade Magazine interview. When asked what it was like to raise a large family in the 1940s and ’50s Bush replied, “My children were [...]
Obama in Roosevelt Room Budget Meeting with VP

Latest Obama Scandal Involves CIA, Secret Service, and Yes, Killer Clowns

The Presidency of Barack Obama has taken yet another turn toward controversy, after it was revealed this weekend that a so-called “training exercise,” which was proposed directly by Obama himself, ended with the hospitalization [...]
ObamaMuslimHero

Obama to Host Religious Awareness Halloween Party: Will Go As a Muslim

<National Report>White House Press Secretary Josh Earnest announced today that President Obama will be hosting a “Religious Awareness Halloween Celebration”. President Obama will be wearing traditional Muslim attire, and Mrs. Obama [...]
FrankLuntz

Obama Calls on Frank Luntz to Spin Ebola Crisis

<National Report> The average person doesn’t have to know who Frank Luntz is to be affected by his work. The Fox News commentator and GOP analyst shaped Newt Gingrich’s Contract With America and changed the relatively benign public [...]
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Obama Abolishes 22nd Amendment-Generals Arrested

WASHINGTON DC-President Barrack Obama, citing his executive authority, has abolished the 22nd Amendment to the U.S. Constitution and, in a related move, ordered over 500 generals in the U.S. Military detained under house arrest. The moves are [...]
JamesOKeefePimp

FEMA Ebola Camps: James O’Keefe Exposes Gov’t ‘Death Cabins’

<National Report> Investigative journalist, author and documentarian James O’Keefe has uncovered an “Area 51” style underground village, built with your tax dollars to hide, house and segregate victims of the deadly Ebola virus. Located [...]
President Monica Lewinsky

Monica Lewinsky Forms Exploratory Committee For Potential 2016 White House Run

<National Report>Former White House intern and current anti-cyberbullying advocate, Monica Lewinsky, has reportedly quietly formed an exploratory committee in consideration of running for President in the 2016 election. News of this alleged [...]
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Rick Perry Blames Ebola On Gays, Threatens Virus With Pistol

At an early morning GOP fundraiser in Dallas on Tuesday, Texas Governor Rick Perry told a group of about five-hundred conservatives that he believes homosexuals are to blame for the global spread of the deadly Ebola disease, and that if [...]
ISS

Family Loses Home After Experimental Drone Confuses “ISS” With “ISIS”

A family of five in Nevada are living out of suitcases in a hotel in Las Vegas today after an experimental military drone crashed into their home in the sleepy town of Pioche on Thursday evening. No one was injured the crash, though the house [...]
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Charlie Sheen’s “Tiger Blood” Might Hold Cure For Ebola, Doctors Say

Hollywood star Charlie Sheen might soon find himself “winning!” a new award — possibly from the Nobel committee — after three doctors in Los Angeles, California revealed on Thursday that they believe Sheen’s blood [...]
Ohio allows voting by smartphone

Ohio Secretary of State Approves New Voting App For November Election

<National Report>In a move to get an incredibly apathetic citizenry to participate in the upcoming November 4th election, Ohio has reportedly approved a new official app to allow anyone in the state to vote from their smartphone. The app, [...]