02252017Headline:

Trump: Brexit Not Good Enough; UK Needs Wall

By now the world is aware that Brexit passed and the United Kingdom has voted to leave the European Union. The news has sent financial markets into chaos and caused the pound sterling to crash. Republican presidential hopeful, Donald Trump, [...]

Walter Palmer To Display Taxidermied Head Of Cecil The Lion In Minn Dentistry Practice

(adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); It appears that the spirit of Cecil the Lion will indeed live on… As a taxidermy piece in Walter Palmer’s office. The beloved lion’s severed head was meticulously stuffed [...]

Caitlyn Jenner Awarded Nobel Prize for Courage

The 2015 Nobel Prize for Courage was awarded to Caitlyn Jenner for “fostering awareness and acceptance of the transgender community”, read a statement released by the prize committee. “By demonstrating the courage and valor of [...]

Yulin Dog Meat Festival: Chinese Chefs Wow Critics With Scrumptious New Dishes

(Yulin, China) – The National Report has sent me on location to the Annual Yulin Dog Meat Festival in China’s Guangxi province, and let me just say it’s an honor to take part in such a rich cultural event. I arrived to take [...]

CIA to Outsource Drone Operations to India

WASHINGTON, D.C. – The Obama administration announced today that, beginning in May, the Central Intelligence Agency will outsource drone operator jobs to India. The positions, which were primarily held by U.S. Air Force personnel, [...]

Volcano Erupts in Chile; Rugby Team Feared Missing and Hungry

BREAKING NEWS – After forty years of relative quiet the Calbuco Volcano has erupted with full force, and while no casualties have been reported, another Uruguayan Rugby Team has disappeared over the Andes. “Everybody’s talking about [...]

Vice President Joe Biden Entered Betty Ford Treatment Center, Sources Confirm

RANCHO MIRAGE, California – Vice President Joe Biden reportedly entered the Betty Ford Center in Rancho Mirage, California on Feb. 26, according to a source close to the chemical dependency recovery facility. Biden was escorted into the Center [...]

Astronomers at Wyoming Institute of Technology Discover Alien Life

The question of whether we are alone in the universe has plagued mankind since our understanding pushed past the horizons of our pretty little planet, to reveal an existence more vast than ever imagined. We have searched the stars, peered into [...]

Saudi Arabia To Allow Women To Watch Cartoons For First Time Since 1957

Beginning in March, Saudi Arabia’s government will lift some, but not all, of their restrictions on females in their country watching cartoons, a ban which has been in place in the country since July of 1957, as a part of what newly-crowned [...]

Did You Know: Heimlich Maneuver Was Invented by Nazis?

NUREMBERG, Germany – A German archivist’s discovery of a 1941 Nazi war document reportedly reveals the sinister origin of today’s life-saving ‘Heimlich maneuver.’ Franz Hoetszel, 38, discovered the 1941 file while [...]

Pope Francis Decrees Abortion Allowable in Certain Cases

<National Report>In a startling reversal of established Catholic doctrine Pope Francis, the ofttimes revolutionary new head of the papacy in Rome, has decreed that abortion, in certain circumstances, is allowable. The Pope made public [...]

Putin To Close Russia’s Borders On October 31st Amid Ebola Concerns

<National Report>Russian President Vladimir Putin reportedly has made the decision to lock down his country’s borders to keep out the dreaded Ebola virus. The closing of borders affects land crossing, all airports and all of Russia’s [...]
Kim Jong-un

North Korea Pays Ransom To ISIS; Kim Jong-Un Returned With Minor Injuries

<National Report>In a shocking turn of events, it appears the North Korean government has acquiesced to demands from radical Islamist terrorist group, ISIS. As we reported here on National Report last week, Kim Jong-Un was believed by [...]

North Korean Soccer Team Detained And Scheduled For Execution After Loss To South Korea

Kim Jong-un has reportedly had the entire North Korean soccer team jailed and awaiting their public execution after enduring a humiliating 1-0 loss to their South Korean rivals. After the game, North Korea’s athletes were escorted to [...]