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‘Wounded Social Justice Warrior Project’ Rebuilds Hope; Sense of Purpose

Prudence Bradley, 19, found it difficult to put into words what she experienced during her days as a social justice warrior. She didn’t have to. The way the slightly overweight feminist apologetically paused, fought back tears, and forced [...]

Obama to Send Large Shipment of ‘Thoughts and Prayers’ to Texas Flood Victims

Houston, TX- Massive flooding this week left at least two dead and millions homeless as the administration scrambles to deploy thoughts and prayers to local governments in coordination with FEMA and other disaster relief agencies. “We’re [...]

Steak, Beer and Oral Sex Secret to Long Life, Say Scientists

(National Report) – Important published works are soon to be released touting the benefits of a largely carnivore’s diet of Steak and whole grains found in beer. The study, sponsored by the Obama administration and Michelle Obama [...]

Boy Scouts Announce Boobs Merit Badge

(National Report) – The Boy Scouts of America are beta testing a new Breasts merit badge for scouts. The badge, to be rolled out in 2014, is expected to be popular. Boob Badges will be an Eagle scout requirement starting January 1, 2015. While [...]

Texas Testicle Festival Chance to Have a Ball with Jesus

(National Report) – One more thing to love about the big state of Texas besides the W Library, low worker safety and funny tasting water – A TESTICLE FESTIVAL! YEE HAW! Who doesn’t like eating testicles, besides blacks, feminists [...]