07312014Headline:
ObamaGolf

Obama Golfs at Arlington National Cemetery!

<National Report>Washington, DC-On the condition of anonymity, a White House spokesman contacted by The National Report, has confirmed that President Obama has been playing golf at Arlington National Cemetery, as shown in this unauthorized [...]
Mmmmm, Bacon and Beer Milkshake

TNReport Sports Report-Oct. 14-20, 2013

By Casssidy Pen, TNReport Sports Reporter NASCAR Gets it Right Again NASCAR (Neoconservative Apes Steering Cars Around Racetracks) in association with the Texas Motor Speedway (#texasmotorspeedway) will announce a new Beer and Bacon Milkshake. [...]
images-4

New CDC Study Indicates Pets Of Gay Couples Worse At Sports, Better At Fashion Than Pets Of Straight Couples

  A special branch of the Center For Disease Control, based in Atlanta, has just announced the upcoming publication of the results of a three year study co-funded by DARPA, the military’s secretive research and development program, [...]
BillMurray

Bill Murray Is Hero After Saving Child’s Life From Oncoming Traffic

London, England — What is Bill Murray not capable of doing? That is the question being asked by London residents today as Murray saved the life of a little girl from being hit by a truck. 34-year-old Paul Horner who is in London on business [...]
This isn't a picture from the Swim Daily article, because obviously you can't swim in a sweater.

SI Swim Daily Features Ugly Pro Golfers with Hot Wives in Bikini and Heels

(National Report) – The Sports Illustrated, Swim Daily online, has a dimpled ball mystery article that includes photographs of pro-golfers and their wives. Set on the grounds of the New Stepford Athletic Club, the images are controversial [...]