07222014Headline:

NASA Miscalculates Asteroid Path; Japanese Scientists Predict Earth Impact

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If you don’t believe in science, you can relax.

Scientists from the Japanese Aerospace Exploration Agency (JAXA) have announced that NASA made a crucial miscalculation in their prediction that asteroid 2013 TV135 will miss Earth.

Lead scientist Yoheshu Kaiwi explained that NASA scientists “failed to account for Earth’s gravitational wobbling”. When this wobbling is factored in, the asteroid is on a direct collision course with Earth.

Dr. Kaiwi graciously explained how the error could occur, “NASA scientists are under constant financial constraints, and the organization really doesn’t have the money to perform such complicated prediction experiments. The Japanese equivalent, JAXA, is much more respected and supported by the Japanese government. Therefore, we really receive the financial support that enables us to correctly make these predictions.”

Dr. Kaiwa ended his announcement on a grave note, “The size of this asteroid will cause great damage to Earth when it collides. We cannot imagine the catastrophe. It will strike with a force greater than 10,000 Godzillas.”

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The Japanese Aerospace Exploration Agency (JAXA) has more money than NASA and is better.

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41 Responses to "NASA Miscalculates Asteroid Path; Japanese Scientists Predict Earth Impact"

  1. Ted Crilly says:

    I’m blaming the White House on this. If Obama hadn’t shut down the government, maybe the NASA scientists might have been able to figure out how to avoid this asteroid. Now this asteroid will kill every last human – and all because of Obamacare.

  2. Brian says:

    Is that all…just, Boom, devastation?

  3. Who says:

    It has been said that one ‘Godzilla’ is equivalent to seven atomic bombs.

    • Sean says:

      Well…a Godzilla in say, Japan, will do much more damage than a Godzilla in Texas. When you factor in the destruction factor coupled with the derivative of the incompetence of the governments, the correct answer is one Godzilla is equal to 5.62 atomic bombs.

    • joseph panaro says:

      Lmao @ Ted that’s great! Please remove yourself from the internet hahahaha

  4. richard mcdaniel says:

    I wonder if this could be the firey mountain that crashes into the ocean spoken about in biblical prophecy?

  5. Dave says:

    How is this Bush’s fault?

    • Meathead says:

      Because Hillary’s hasn’t been President yet so we can’t blame her!

    • Greg says:

      Because they are and all have been part of the same Zionist control since the beginning !! example THE PATRIOT ACT !! 911 THERMITE Rethinking Thermite

      One of the pieces of evidence use to say the buildings were brought down is a photo with something they interpret as being left behind by a thermite reaction ONLY AVAILABLE TO THE US GOVERNMENT!!! AT THE TIME !!! WATCH 9/11 Mysteries: Demolitions YOU TUBE

  6. Mr. F says:

    This is great hahahaha remove yourself from the internetet

  7. Clement Vanlandingham says:

    Thanks, Obama.

  8. Shelly says:

    When is it going to collide with Earth? Anyone know?

  9. Alifpolestar says:

    What on the earth is “…greater than 10,000 GODZILLAS.” !!!!!!!!

    • Mark says:

      10001 godzillas? Oh and the ‘what on earth’ is greater than 10000 godzillas’ well, the answer is nothing, as this is coming from space.

  10. Rodrigo says:

    10,000 Godzillas; that’s very precise…

  11. phillip says:

    That’s OK. We have 15000 Godzillas from Japan, Philipines, and Texas to deflect that asteroid. Nice knowing you.

  12. Rascally says:

    Maybe if Obama didn’t have NASA working on MUSLIM OUTREACH and VALIDATING FALSE CLAIMS OF GLOBAL WARMING …NASA would have time to do their Jobs ….When my father worked in the space industry from 1963 on they hired the best and Brightest …and only kept the best and brightest…now we don’t even have a space industry and NASA still can’t do today what used to be done men with slide rules in my fathers day

  13. Deez Nutz says:

    ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

  14. Baby Mama Drama says:

    Now onto news that really matters, I just farted!

  15. Hardee Har Har says:

    Relax fools, nuttin’s gonna happen! How many times will bitch ass niggas fall fo dis funkee azz shizknit? Werd 2 da mutha!

  16. Peter Pollard says:

    Its not myself that I worry about, its the children of the Priests and Nuns.

  17. Super Serious says:

    Awww, this is like pretending to throw for ball to a dog. You’re just gonna confuse ‘em!

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