Kate Bush Tour Sells Out In 15 Minutes Inciting Riots Worldwide

Kate Bush

Kate Bush

Fires roared and cities exploded into violence as people took to the streets to vent their rage over being unable to procure coveted Kate Bush tickets. Every venue was sold out within a matter of minutes provoking riots worldwide as hundreds of hardcore Kate Bush fanatics took to the street in a rabid frenzy of maniacal frustration.

“I have been waiting my entire life for this! My dreams have been dashed on the rocks!” screamed Chaz Spires who was just one of a massive number of inconsolable devotees who were spotted wreaking chaos in the streets early this morning.

The Kate Bush induced frenzy continued into the late afternoon until riot squads were summoned to subdue the ruckus. Hundreds of dejected Kate Bush fiends were hosed down with tear gas and hauled to jail where they will await sentencing on charges ranging from disorderly conduct to destruction of property.

Tickets went on sale early this morning at around 9:30 am, with a limit of four per person. Those who were members of Kate Bush’s fan club were eligible for a limited amount of pre-sale tickets, all of which sold out in less than 30 minutes.

Every Venue Was Sold Out Within A Matter Of Minutes Provoking Riots Worldwide As Hundreds Of Hardcore Kate Bush Fanatics Took To The Street In A Rabid Frenzy Of Maniacal Frustration

The singer says she is “completely overwhelmed” by the response to her first show in 35 years. She added a further seven shows to her residency at the Eventim Apollo, Hammersmith this week, and will now be playing 22 gigs in all.

The addition of these shows gave some Kate Bush buffs reason to celebrate as they were able to snag the last remaining tickets. Others were left out in the cold, despairing over their ticketless status as servers froze and their dreams of landing the once in a lifetime opportunity of seeing their beloved chanteuse live and in person became just a bitter memory. Evidently it was more than some could bear.

Photo credits: Kate Bush, By Hans Splinter (Knight of the Progs) [CC BY 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons, Source: Knight of the Progs, http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File%3ADutch_Kate_Bush.jpg

Rioters Throwing Metal Tubes at Police, By Mstyslav Chernov/Unframe (Self-photographed, http://mstyslavchernov.com/) [CC BY-SA 3.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0)], via Wikimedia Commons, Source: http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File%3AProtesters_throwing_pieces_of_paving_during_and_metal_tubes_at_riot_police_during_clashes_at_Bankova_str%2C_Kiev%2C_Ukraine._December_1%2C_2013.jpg


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4 Responses to "Kate Bush Tour Sells Out In 15 Minutes Inciting Riots Worldwide"

  1. Jane who is Kate Bush?

  2. The Pensioner says:

    Well, I least I got my tickets to Miley Montana.

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