12162018Headline:

Trump White House Prepares Pardons for Two Jive-Ass Turkeys

<Washington, DC>In keeping with longstanding tradition, the White House is said to be preparing pardons for two jive-ass turkeys, according to high ranking officials with no knowledge of the decision.  The turkeys, “Eric” [...]

Senators McCain and Graham Vow to Spend Countless Hours on Fox Blaming Obama Administration for Boston Bombing

<National Report>The Obama Administration was quick to announce today’s bombing in Boston occurred “spontaneously” in response to an the running of the Boston Marathon and NOT a coordinated terrorist attack.  Senators McCain [...]

Massive Herpes Outbreak Reported at Coachella

<National Report>  Multiple sources have confirmed a massive outbreak of herpes reported at Coachella.  The multi-day “music” festival held in Indio, California kicked off today as hundreds of thousands of priveleged Southern [...]