04162014Headline:

California Allows First-Ever State Recognized Human-Animal Marriage

man marries dog

Paul Horner and his dog Mac at their wedding on Monday in front of friends, family and a priest declaring their love towards each other for eternity.

San Francisco, CA — On Monday history was made at the Chapel of Our Lady at the Presidio in San Francisco as the first-ever state recognized human-animal marriage took place.

Local resident 35-year-old Paul Horner was the groom during the ceremony. Joining him was his faithful dog Mac who is 36-years-old in dog years. Mac also decided to be the groom but ended up wearing a white veil at the last moment.

Father McHale who officiated the outdoor wedding told reporters he was extremely happy to be a part of this joyous moment of life. “This is the definition of true love my friends. There is nothing more sacred than the bond between a man and his faithful dog,” McHale said. “Now, since it is recognized as a legally binding marriage in the state of California, Mr. Horner and Mac will have all the same tax benefits and everything else coming to them that a regular married couple would receive. It’s a fantastic day to be alive!”


So how could this have happened?

In the book of California’s State Laws and Regulations there is a little known law that was passed as the state was first forming in 1850. According to article 155, paragraph 10, it clearly states:

If a man and a man can get married and a woman and a woman can get married, if ever comes that day, then a human and animal will have the exact same rights to marriage in every eye of the law. God help us if this ever is to happen!

In attendance was Horner’s entire family who flew in from Hawaii to witness the event. Mac had her puppies on hand and making a special celebrity appearance was Alex from Stroh’s and Spuds Mckenzie.

“I just love my Mac so much, I can’t wait till we can finally get back to the honeymoon sweet in Montana where bestiality is legal. Gosh, get with the times California! We can marry here just fine, but love making is a big no-no,” said Horner. “People keep asking me why I wanted to marry a dog. I told them I just want the same god given rights that every person in California is allowed to have. Don’t tell me I can’t marry my dog. I don’t tell you that you can’t marry a 500 lb woman with herpes. That’s your decision. Don’t tread on me. I love my dog and I know he loves me a hundred times more than any gay wedding out there.”

With this wedding between a man and a male dog now on the books, one can only ask what is in store next?

A man marrying a toaster? A toaster marrying a dog? A toaster marrying a toaster?

America, what happened to the sanctity of marriage? Tsk. Tsk.



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305 Responses to "California Allows First-Ever State Recognized Human-Animal Marriage"

  1. Zot says:

    Tha end is at hand,we need to draw closer to Christ in time like this.Mac does not need Christ but Paul needs Him seriously.God hates this act.

    • Gerald says:

      There’s absolutely no doubt about that my dear fellow believer in our LORD & SAVIOR CHRIST JESUS..My Pastor started preaching wit this story yesterday..We as CHRISTIANS must do all we possibly can to win the lost for CHRIST JESUS..LORD have mercy!!! United States Of America!!!!! Decision Maker!

  2. habtamu says:

    u cursed take care of ur did

  3. joel says:

    Romans 1:28
    When they refused to acknowledge God, he abandoned them to their evil minds and let them do things that should never be done………..it is the result of ….refused to acknowledge God,

  4. joel says:

    Romans 1:28 When they refused to acknowledge God, he abandoned them to their evil minds and let them do things that should never be done…………

  5. nike says:

    Madness on display. Satan nd his followers, ur days are numbered

  6. renee says:

    Is this a joke?

  7. browneyesgirl says:

    yes farther! help us.

  8. ms says:

    When you change the definition of marriage this is what you get. It can mean anything anymore wants it to meam.

  9. Wells says:

    Did the dog actually sign the marriage cerificate or did someone pick up his leg and press his paw for an imprint on the marriage certificate? Forced marriage is not legal for humans let alone animals!!!

  10. browneyesgirl says:

    This is it! the Bible revealing………

  11. Qweenlois says:

    God have mercy…….!!!!!!!

  12. Tom says:

    This is evil . May the good help us all.
    Humans are being return to even less than animal, all in the name of human rights. Satan had taken so many souls of men.First it was men and men(Gay marriage), women and women , now it is human animal marriage. May the good Lord deliver us. These are signs of end times

  13. Benson says:

    My friend said one sin leads to another. The Western World has allowed man to marry man and woman to marry woman. This one is coming as a man marrying animal. God has given them to dead conscience. Very soon another strange thing will come up in the name of human rights. Morality and godliness have been thrown overboard.

  14. Don Mc iyke says:

    it is babaric.a rational human being cant do this…i think horner is insane……

  15. Odey says:

    It is very unfortunate that this world is changing, pls I will call on Pastors, Bishops, Rev. Fathers etc in all denominations to stop encouraging this such of act

  16. Brun says:

    It’s about time. Now when can I marry my DEAD billy goat?

    If we can have zoophilia (animal love), why not homozoonecrophilia (dead gay animal love)?

  17. Jakernaught says:

    Even if this was true, the person who did it is probably a right wing troll just trying to rally the base. Once he files for taxes the federal government will strike down the law, which was obviously a very distasteful joke for our time, yet seemed appropriate in 1850. You know what was also appropriate in 1850, beating your wife and woman your rights at the time were little better than the bitch this guy married.

    Cheers,
    Jake

  18. tibigambwa says:

    When Uganda, Nigeria and Russia rose against homosexuality and LGBTI, most of the western people emphasized their concern against it (the decision). I’m sure every comment posted against this strategy was automatically deleted coz 100% of the critics were that dominant. As predicted by Mugabe of Zimbabwe, just like how man-man, woman-woman…et cetera is legalized in the majority of western countries, human-animal marriage would also be hugely legalized with time to come…and now, as usual, it has started in the great U.S!

    Funny enough, western leaders who emphasize this can never come up to openly and comfortably say this or defend their critics and whatever relationships they are ready to counsel with any country opposing LGBTI rights while on international media with fear of shame and prejudice! They also feel it’s completely abnormal! They were conceived due to man+woman rather than man+man! Moreover, they can’t and never say a word if Arab nations or China, Japan…et cetera came uo with such a strategy. These nations are ready to defend their social ways of living whatever it takes unlike us in Africa.

    God bless America and save those who are still ‘Humans’!

    • Brun says:

      And this is why Africa is still considered barbaric!

      • Rodney Frenda says:

        Well Brun, you haven’t changed at all from the colonial days when Africa was considered barbaric. What an ignorant bigot you are, these people are standing up for the truth, something you feel deep inside that rightly causes revulsion. Ignorant Americans are blind to the barbarism within their own country, where living conditions are bordering on third-world, death by firearm is rampant and ten percent are in gaol. Pull your head in!

        • Brun says:

          A return to fervent religiosity will only increase barbarism.

          • soren says:

            Brun, listen to this and wake up, you are more barbaric than the Africa today, you are just an animal. The way you think is against God who gave you live and the right to live. Just open your eye and see around you the judgement of God is coming over America in the year 2016, you will look for tears that day and you will not find any, I am representing all the people who believes in God, and I am talking with the authority I received right now to talk to you watch out, Be careful about whatever you say, the day of judgement is near, very close to you and will be knocking at your door soon. You will remember me that day and you will see me even in your dream. who ever read this and believe will be justified, and those who do not believed will be judged by what I wrote.

          • Brun says:

            Death penalty for gays? Barbaric. (Christian/Muslim/Animist)
            Burning schools because they teach ‘western’ education? Barbaric. (Muslim)
            Drastic spread of AIDS and both Christianity and Islam reject condoms? Barbaric.
            Slavery still in existence? Barbaric.

            America is pretty fucked too, of course.

            Cthulhu may rise, but I will not weep.

            You sir, advocate savagery. If your religion is in line with this, your religion is savage.

            Anything else?

  19. Givengrace says:

    The instruction 4rm God is that man should dominate over every living CREATURE…A dog and a human? He wld hv made it a lion a bird or a snake..this is the dumbest idea ever…that man is possessed by satanic spirits nd datz nt a priest d Bible talks abt…

  20. Lee says:

    So are they going to have kids? Oh wait, the dog is male? So did he propose to the dog? Hold up, did the dog say “I do” or did he bark the nuptials.. & his family flew from Hawaai to witness this madness?! So is the dog going to carry his name? & the priest, is he also a dog?? The devil thinks he reigns supreme but christ is coming! I wish this happened in the muslim world so that these lunatics could be stoned to death, PATHETIC!

  21. david says:

    Abomination! This is a very grievous sin before God! This is what results when monogamy &all manner of sodomy is legalised! Xtian,biblical Polygamy according to Isaiah 4:1-2 is the solution! God bless you!

  22. praise says:

    You pathetic europeans wait till d anger of God is fully manifested on you

  23. david says:

    Hello Brun, yes! Polygamy is d answer! Any society where d social system of monogamy is legalised,men wil becom callous,wicked &brutish like it happened in Sodom&Gomorrah. Lot had only one wife.He was a typical example of monogamous men in Sodom &Gomorrah compared to d polygamous practice obtainable in Canaanland where Abraham dwelt.God later destroyed Sodom &Gomorrah but He informed His friend (polygamous Abraham)before the destruction. “Righteous Lot” later committed incest wit his 2 virgin daughters because even though Sodom &Gomorrah was destroyed, d seed of immorality, perversion &contamination which had been planted in Lot’s family keep growing.Finally,polygamous Abraham was justified by faith while monogamous, incestuous Lot &sodomites were cursed &destroyed! Gen.13:8-18 ;14:1-16 ;18:16-33 ;19:1-38.

    • Rodney Frenda says:

      Abraham had only one wife, Sarah. When Abraham did not conceive through Sarah he had sex with Sarah’s handmaiden, Rahab, thinking that this was the way to fulfil God’s promise that Abraham would have a son (an example of humans trying to fulfil God’s promise through their own means – always a mistake). Rahab conceived and bore Abraham a son, Ishmael and both were later sent away by Abraham (Gen 21:14) as the situation between Sarah and Hagar had become unworkable. So in fact this is an example of extra-marital or a polygamous type situation not working, and causing great distress. It is not an example of successful polygamy. In due course Sarah conceived, although both she and Abraham were very old, according to God’s promise, within their restored monogamous marriage.

    • Brun says:

      Really? This is the first time I’ve heard this analysis of polygamy. Seems to me that in situations where it is practised (islamic countries and FLDS come to mind) women are oppressed.

      Sounds like a great system.

      The bible is HARDLY a source of morality…

      • king solomon says:

        Satan son and his dog will have there part in the lake off fire repent and god will forgive You repent now give prase to god and isreal.

        • Brun says:

          IA! IA! Oh Great Cthulhu, who lies dead but dreaming, awaiting the return of the Old Ones! Oh Great Yog-Sothoth! Eater of Souls! We prepare the world for the coming of your great Doom!

          Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Cthulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn!
          Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Cthulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn!
          Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Cthulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn!
          Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Cthulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn!
          Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Cthulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn!

          • Jenn says:

            Keep up the good work, Brun.
            It’s a losing battle with these nitwits. It was only a matter of time before some nutjob tried it. Better you than me.

    • Tommy says:

      My friend, you are seriously flawed in your doctrine. I can appreciate that you are trying, but you are making very inaccurate assumptions. If you want to use Abraham as an example, then use him properly. Though polygamy was common it was not the goal. Abraham took Sarah’s hand maid and procreated with her only for the purpose of obtaining an heir. But that was him stepping out of the will of God, thus God did not recognize that as a union. Look at the mess it caused through history. The descendants of Isaac were always at odds with the descendants of Ishmael and this continues today. With that being said, your argument is not supported by your example, but rather monogamy is. Since you feel the need to split hairs on biblical issues, lets go to the beginning. God created all the creatures and Man. Genesis 2:20 says, “The man gave names to all the livestock, to the birds of the sky, and to every wild animal; but for the man no helper was found as his complement.” No animal was worthy to be mans helpmate, including a dog. So God in His infinite wisdom created “A” helpmate. Genesis 2:22 says, “Then the LORD God made the rib He had taken from the man into a woman and brought her to the man.” One woman to be one wife to one man. That was the design and man took it upon himself to pervert marriage and seek his own lust.

  24. Emmanuel says:

    There is no prophet to proclaim this anymore.
    The END TIME has come. Let us watch and pray.
    May God forgive them.

  25. Sir Emmy Achoda says:

    This sad and insane man is only trying to catch the attentiion of the press and the world.
    And the misinterpretation of the California Archaic Constitution.

    God have mercy on the whole world.

  26. Francis says:

    WHAT CHOICE ARE YOU MAKING TODAY? who are you serving? God or Satan,where do you want to live after this world? heaven or hell,where do you place your treasure? on earth or in heaven,whose power are you using? God’s power or satan’s power,are you among the sheep or the goat? are you among the wise virgin? or among the foolish virgin, is your name still in the book of life? are you recognise in heaven or in hell? is it heaven that is smiling at you or hell? REMEMBER you must be serving somebody.You can not seat on the fence. So make a wise decision today.JESUS LOVES YOU AND HE SAVES.

    • Brun says:

      Jesus saves 15% or more with Geico.

      Sitting on fences is very painful, have you ever done it? There used to be a crazy pigeon guy in my old neighborhood who would sit on a FIRE HYDRANT! Imagine that!

      Both sheep and goats are very tasty. You should find a nice Greek restaurant.

  27. Franklin says:

    We are in the end time,the kingdom of God is at hand, Jesus is coming soon.
    other way this, paul Horner wants some attention, and he finally got it.

  28. Franklin says:

    He is insane and demonic posses he needs extreme deliverance.

  29. richard says:

    Nothing have or can surprise me about these whole thing course they’ve been foretold. But one thing “maybe” sort of bothers me! Of all the places these unthinkable acts begin, spark, or are given support…why the church? I always tell people to stop calling a building “the house of God” it’s belittling and sinful. However, no man can mock God. Those who have seen the light pity these fools, its governments and its supporters! God is merciful, God is upon His throne, nothing man would do can bruise the light “God” whatever man does is to his condemnation! The devil and his angels have been condemned and they hate the fact that they can’t experience God’s love “the light and purest of joy and love” so they in turn try to make sure we “humans” end up like them. God have mercy upon us but I count it a blessing to be born in these times, where we see it as jesus and the book have said it shall be! I love jesus, I love God. In my sinful flesh only the authority of christ I recognise and accept. Christ the king! My king, my saviour!

  30. Dan says:

    Guys, can’t you figure out this whole article is satire! No such law exists in California. I am not so sure about the laws in Croatia, but for crying out loud, learn to express your outrage at real news rather than fake news!

    Sam, I hope you are not calling yourself a Christian, because if you are, you are only giving Christianity a bad rap.

  31. Wade says:

    Brun – I would like you to understand that I truly & genuinely applaud you for calling out the (supposed) Christians who have commented before me. I, too, am a Christian and find it difficult to defend the actions & words of my Christian brothers & sisters when they post comments that are uncharacteristic of Christ-like behavior. Specifically, but not limited to calling for your death in one way or another.

    Having said that, one never really knows who the “real” person is behind the comments they leave. There are Christians out there who for some reason post things that sound as if they’re devil worshippers, and their are non-Christians who post comments suggesting that they are true believers. IMHO both are done with deceptive motives; either to sway someone’s thinking one way or another, or they’re simply of some teenage mindset, just acting stupid (and I don’t mean ALL teens). Until you meet someone face to face, you really don’t get a feel for who they really are (and even then it can be difficult).

    To anyone else who cares to keep reading my personal thoughts…
    Please read this link below. This whole man marries his dog article is as much of a joke to rattle emotions as that of crop circles created by aliens.

    http://beforeitsnews.com/media/2014/02/the-california-man-who-marries-a-dog-story-looks-like-a-hoax-to-me-2478528.html

    Bottom line, every human being is flawed in one way or another. To pass judgment or condemn someone else is self-deprecating. We Christians are supposed to plant the seeds, not burn the weeds – that will be up to our merciful Heavenly Father. May the peace of Christ be with you, Brun, and everyone else who reads this.

    • Brun says:

      Thanks for realizing this is satire, and showing some rationality.

      I do like having fun with people who are overly serious.

      XD

      Peace + love to you too.

      • Wade says:

        It is not difficult to understand why people jump to conclusions and have knee-jerk responses/reactions regarding various issues, be they religious, political or whatever.

        What is difficult for me to comprehend is that there are people out and about who take pleasure, and perhaps pride, in instigating, promoting and/or continuing conflict among their fellow men & women.

        Constructive dialogue that offers facts and reasonable arguments wins out over name-calling and supercilious comments and threats every time.

  32. Stuart says:

    Please tell me you’re all trolls?
    You do realise this is fake, and satire news, right? Did any of you even bother to look up article 155 of California state law (for reference, there is no ‘article 155, paragraph 10′? Or did you decide to just blindly follow National Report as you would the bible?

  33. Candysmilee says:

    This is a big sign, He will come soon!!!

  34. LaRona says:

    Amen adam!

  35. jamy says:

    Shame on you! You are mocking God the one who said that man shall marry a woman.
    May the mercy of God be upon you. U need to be delivered.

  36. Lillian Fabricant Lillian Fabricant says:

    That’s what my pregnant mother has been screaming for YEARS

  37. Mary says:

    What a bunch of NONSENSE!!! What is this idiot gonna do, have sex with his dumb dog?? They ALL need to get a life. Stupid crazy dumb nonsense!!! People put so much effort into a stupid animal MORE than human beings. DUMB, DUMB AND DUMBER SMH

  38. Lillian Fabricant Lillian Fabricant says:

    There’s nothing funny about getting dropped off at work by your screaming pregnant mother for year after year as your youth slowly slips away. Just deliver me already for chrissakes. But I’ll admit it’s pretty funny when we slip on a banana peel, her holding a big bag of groceries and me with my little one. Sometimes I shoot clear across the parking lot, then that umbilical cord recoils like someone won’t take their foot off the vacuum cleaner pedal and before I know it I’m crammed back in the uterus and Mother is screaming and screaming and screaming again. Meh.

  39. thony says:

    Just wondering Father McHale? Which church is he under????

  40. Judy says:

    No Mary, animals are not stupid, They are exactly as they are suppose to be. Its Humans that are stupid, and disrespectful to nature and our creator.

  41. Ambrose says:

    Sure, sure

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