African-American Membership in Klan at All Time High

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By Cassidy Pen

ATLANTA, Georgia (TNReport) – President Obama, Hollywood, current events, and social diversity are reasons experts claim African-American membership in the Ku Klux Klan is higher than it has ever been.

The traditionally pro-aryan organization has changed along with the rest of society. The process started in the 1960’s with President Johnson’s (D-TX) civil rights act, but a recent bump in numbers was expected by some.

Not everyone looks at this as good news. Wille Ray Dobson, Grand Slack Lizard of Georgia’s Empirical Klans of America, is not taking the news kindly. “We go through a very strict and thorough screening process to prevent these such occurrences,” said Dobson, “I ain’t never thought I’d see the day.”

It seems that this day has been coming for many years. A black detective in Colorado recently used his knowledge of racial slurs to become a high ranking officer in the Mandingo-loathing association.

Experts point mainly to almost universal contempt for President Obama’s socialist agenda for the spike in black klanners. “It’s one thing to judge a president based on his policies,” said a spokesman, “but to bring his race into the discussion shows that racism is not yet dead in the US.”

While some African-Americans remain secretive about their affiliation with the 150 year-old hate group, many openly flaunt their membership. One black man told this reporter that he joined the KKK to meet white women. Another appreciated the higher social standing that he achieved as a card-carrying white supremacist.

Comedy performers, like Dave Chappelle, have contributed to black kkk numbers.

Comedy performers, like Dave Chappelle, have contributed to black kkk numbers.

Hollywood liberalism and socialist group-think mindsets have also contributed to the shadowy changes in the klan constituency. Groundbreaking Saturday Night Live and Dave Chappelle skits are mentioned. “At this rate,” explains Dobson, “The average klan skin pigment will be a dingy grey by the end of the century.”

A massive simultaneous klan rally in Georgia and other locations is planned in reaction to this news.


Photo credits: Leo Felton, Black Klansmen, By Unknown,  licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 3.0, Source: http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/BoomerangBigot,

Dave Chappelle portrays Clayton Bigsby, a blind black white supremacist on his TV show, The Dave Chappelle Show, YouTube Screenshot, Source: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u__W0Qa8v0k

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12 Responses to "African-American Membership in Klan at All Time High"

  1. Greg doyle says:

    You have not cited one source to support this waste of words. You are an idiot. Sorry to have to say that, but drivel like this makes me do it.

  2. Master's Johnson says:

    And yet a truly racist black organization like the NBA is working hard to get rid of the one truly embattled and harassed minorities in the world: old, rich, billionaire, white guys like Donald Sterling…

  3. Stu Pedaso says:

    Another hard hitting expose of collapse of American values. I salute you sir for all the good work you do!

  4. Peter Floyd says:

    As I was reading this article, I thought “What great ‘The Onion’ piece!”
    Then I scrolled back up to the masthead and burst out laughing.

    But let’s take the article at face value.

    My first comment is about the graph. There are no numbers on the y-axis. there is a big difference if the values go from 0% to .5% or go from 0% to 20%.

    My second comment is about using comedy shows as examples. That’s like saying Steven Cobert’s show helps convert liberals to conservatives.

    My third comment is that the black police detective sting as back in the ’70s. The detective responded by phone, used the KKK slang, and they sent him a membership without even meeting him. At no time did he agree with the KKK ideals. Even if he was seriously joining, that membership would not be part of the supposed growth between 2004 and 2014.

  5. Jero says:

    Dear Corny Bart, thank you for this hard hitting expose that didn’t pull punches. I am encouraged, and hope that eventually the African American membership in the clan will get to 120-130%. This will radically change these sheets!

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